‘SHe Said’ Delivers Rockin’ Story of Relationship Evolution

SHe Said band on stage: Melissa Montalto, Kathy Moore, RL Heyer, Richard Davidson, Geoff Reading

The Evergreen Echo

On January 15, the Intiman Theatre in Capitol Hill debuted SHe Said, a musical inspired by Trans love, resistance, and a whole lot of rock ‘n roll. Jen Ayers, along with a talented backing band, tells the true story of her partner coming out as transgender and the whirlwind of emotions that ensued. SHe Said is a heartfelt musical, touching on every feeling, heartbreak, and swirling thoughts that Jen experienced, along with the love for her partner that kept her aloft.

Intiman Theatre is the theatre-in-residence at Seattle Central College, offering a technical art degree and two different venue locations in the heart of Capitol Hill, including the Erickson Theatre, where SHe Said debuted. Founded in 1972, Intiman Theatre has presented over 240 productions, and continues to share musicals, plays, and stories that confront bigotry and uplift the voices of people who don’t often get the chance to share their stories. 

As a journalist who mostly focuses on Queer storytelling and shows that center Trans and Queer actors, I will be honest that I entered the show a bit hesitant. How would this story be told? Would it be overly complimentary or borderline insulting? It is easy to get nervous as a Trans artist these days, in that any stories told about us, but not by us, have the potential to be harmful. When I entered the theatre—set up to mimic a cabaret-style nightclub—I was apprehensive. 

But from the moment Ayers began to tell her story, I was relieved and hooked. The love Ayers felt and feels for her partner is abundant throughout the production, and the care she takes to tell her story is a testament to that very love. Every performed chord, note, and melody in this musical feels like a line in the story of their relationship, absolutely oozing with gratitude and adoration. 

Jen Ayers

The Evergreen Echo

This isn’t to say that SHe Said is just a love story with a few dips into rock n’ roll. It’s an honest look into the experience of someone’s transition from the outside. Ayers’ story is one often tucked away: the story of a long-term heteronormative relationship that suddenly needs to change and grow to accommodate and uplift the transition of one of its halves. For Ayers, the change was oftentimes difficult and confusing, but, as the singer-songwriter says, “When shit gets tough, I get prolific.”

There are many parts of this musical that I wish to bottle and save for later, but one of my favorite moments (spoiler alert!) is when Ayers recounts the days after her partner comes out—as she begins to find herself. While Ayers is confused and unsure how to move forward, it is clear her partner is finally feeling free. In Ayers’ own words, “My husband was becoming a rock goddess.” Enter Graham Gray, Jen’s partner, wearing a dazzling floral dress, singing her heart out, delivering powerful lyrics and vocals. As she strutted through the crowd, the audience erupted with applause and cheers. For a moment, I believe that we felt what Jen must have felt back then—shock mixed with pride. It was/is true, Graham Gray Ayers has fully become a rock goddess.

Even the sadder parts of this musical are alive with Ayers’ honesty and love. Even as she struggles to understand what her partner is going through, it’s clear that she knows the journey is hard but important. She never stops uplifting her partner, always wanting to make sure they can be their very best self and experience all that their transition has to offer. “You deserve to be yourself without having to ask for permission,” she says, a message for her partner but also for herself. 

Through music, Jen Ayers pulls us into her thoughts and grapplings with her partner’s transition. Her songs are beautiful and lively, with incredible lyricism and stunning vocals. The backing band, including RL Heyer, Kathy Moore, Melissa Montalto, Geoff Reading, and Richard Davidson, all delivered a magical live performance. With music and tenderness woven together with the story of Jen’s relationship to Graham Gray, SHe Said comes fully alive.